A fond farewell to the big-league bigots

For lovers of schadenfreude there have been rich pickings this week.

We'll get the minor leaguer out of the way first. Collin Brewer, an Independent Cornish councillor, made the national news when was forced to quit after saying that disabled children should be "put down" as they cost the council too much.

This would have been bad enough but he initially refused to resign, saying he had apologised and had done nothing wrong anyway.

"Sometimes people can catch you on the wrong day," he remarked. Formally known as the "I don't like Mondays" defence.

Christ you wouldn't want to catch him on a REALLY bad day would you?

"Right that's it - the toast's burnt. Let's introduce torture for parking offences."

I'll tell you what costs councils too much money. Cretinous "independent" councillors who only run for election because they like the sound of their own voice.

While we're on the subject of people who love the sound of their own voice, who would have thought it took so long to get shot of a pope? He did more farewell tours than Michael Jackson.

Benedict XVI eventually bowed out on Thursday after an interminable deluge of hagiographic waffle.

I don't know who he's got doing his PR but they're bloody good because they somehow managed to con half the world into thinking this was a penitent, saintly scholar who was humbly stepping aside, not a dodgy old fascist jumping ship to avoid the rising levels of ordure engulfing the holy order.

And after all that he didn't even go far, just a quick hop, skip and a jump to Castel Gandolfo.

As "retirements" go it's an odd one. He keeps the dress, the title albeit prefixed with emeritus, the secretary and the house. Nice gig if you can get it.

Ratzinger has vowed to stay in Vatican City like a grisly ghost at the banquet, sort of like a self-imposed control order.

Which may have something to do with the fact that if he went back to Germany he'd more than likely get his collar felt for his role in covering up child abuse on a systemic scale.

I seem to recall Manuel Noriega thinking it was a good move to hide out there too.

But of course Ratzinger wasn't the only high-profile departure from the ranks of the Church. This month has also seen the downfall of Britain's top Catholic and arch-homophobe Cardinal Keith O'Brien over allegations of abusing young priests.

O'Brien was often cited for his controversial views. On gay marriage, for example: "The empirical evidence is clear - same-sex relationships are demonstrably harmful to the medical, emotional and spiritual well-being of those involved. No compassionate society should ever enact legislation to facilitate or promote such relationships."

Don't you just love it when a bloke who believes he was called by God talks about empirical evidence?

Britain's aid to Pakistan meant its foreign policy was "anti-Christian." O'Brien also said the government's embryology Bill was a "monstrous attack on human rights" and an "evil" endorsement of "Frankenstein" experiments before muttering darkly about the dangers of "animal-human hybrids."

I'd like to see where his "empirical evidence" for that is. That's not IVF, it's the plot of The Fly.

And one tip for the ex-archbishop - if there's a distinct possibility you're going to have to deny sexual abuse claims somewhere down the line it's probably not a good idea to pose for pics with Jimmy Savile.