Canny Coyle can plot my comeback

To give you an idea of my troubles, I was rustling up some chopped bananas in a frying pan last week, continuously tossing them over and over for what seemed like three hours, as I thought of ways of shaking myself out of my current funk.

Indeed, it's safe to say I'm frittering my life away. All banana puns aside, finding value in the football fixture list this weekend is akin to West Ham's Benni McCarthy getting up from a bean-bag - an almighty struggle.

The game that has attracted my attention is underrated Bolton's trip to Arsenal.

In four of the last six meetings between the sides Arsenal have fallen behind in the game and have had to rely on strong second-half performances to get them out of jail.

With an injury crisis currently cast upon the Gunners - and the fact that Bolton are a hugely improved side under Owen Coyle - it's feasible for Bolton to snatch a point.

Back the Trotters in the draw no bet market at 12-1 (Betfair.com), and maybe my punting life can start to bear fruit once again.