Wallowing in power

Not sure whether they are in government or in opposition, not sure whether they are progressive or reactionary, not even sure if they havehit the jackpot or been suckered into being the biggest fall guys in political history, their conference has so far been more tragedy than farce, although both options seem still to be open.

They are, in short, the most pathetic spectacle that British politics has seen in a very long time.

The overwhelming conclusion that speaker after speaker has produced at their conference seems to be: "Well I didn't want it, but we're stuck with it, so now let's revel in it." What a commentary on Lib-Dem values that is.

But don't those in the upper echelons of the Lib Dems just love their little sniff of illusory power, no matter what contradictions it develops? They are absolutely revelling in turning their coats and seem to have no conception of just how ludicrous their position has become.

Let's look at the absurd position of Chief Treasury Secretary Danny Alexander. Likening tax evaders to benefit cheats, he told the party's conference that "ruthless" measures to hit evasion could raise £7 billion a year by 2015, helping to cut the deficit.

Bloody hell, Mr Alexander, that's a bit radical. But, on second thoughts, no it isn't.

According to War on Want, Britain's economy is losing £100 billion a year through tax-dodging in the form of uncollected tax, illegal tax evasion and the abuse of tax loopholes - which is almost solely the preserve of corporations and the very wealthy.

So what the soppy Mr Alexander is really talking about is a 7 per cent collection rate - not exactly very effective and a level which the public servants that Mr Alexander's coalition is trying to make redundant in her Majesty's Revenue would be ashamed of as a professional target.

But let's keep bashing the poor, Mr Alexander, it's a talent that you've just discovered and you seem to be better at that than you clearly are at squeezing the rich - you know them, they are the people you are working with in government.

He's a good example, is Mr Alexander, so let's follow his rubbish just a bit further.

He says, and it's worth quoting him directly, "I would like to say one thing to nurses, teachers, police officers and civil servants. Thank you."

"Your ideas, your effort and your commitment are essential in helping people get the best from the services you provide."

It's a bit unclear, however, how the 40,000 or so police officers that his coalition is going to make redundant are going to display that commitment from the dole queues, but we're sure he means well.

And it's not clear either how over 100,000 civil servants are going to provide services after they've been similarly disposed of.

"We do not want to take you on. We want to take you with us," says Mr Alexander to public servants. But where is he supposed to be taking them?

He and his allies have made it clear that vast numbers of civil servants are headed only for unemployment and, however much we might wish it, it's doubtful that he is offering to join the dole queues with them.

His leader Nick Clegg kicked off the conference by saying that "I want everyone in this room to just stop and enjoy it for a second. I hope each and every one of you is as proud as I am of what we have already achieved."

If they are, Mr Clegg, they are as stupid, vicious, power-hungry and unprincipled as you yourself have proven to be. We might have hoped for better.

And, in the next period, we will fight you to a standstill in order to achieve better.