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Aug
2015
Saturday 22nd
posted by Morning Star in Arts

“you loved me as a loser, but now you’re worried that I just might win” Leonard Cohen            

                                                                                                                           for JC 

The minute they realise

you might succeed in changing

more than the occasional

light bulb in the new

old community centre,

where the anti-apartheid

meetings used to happen; 

 

the late Lord Lambton 

climbs out from between 

two prostitutes and into

the next available issue

of the Daily Express 

to urge votes for anyone

but you; Earl Haig 

 

gets up from his grave

to bang the table and tell us

you’ve not successfully 

organised enough death

to properly understand 

Britain’s defence needs

in the twenty first century. 

 

The Telegraph mutters

into its whiskers about your lack

of experience – how you never once

so much as successfully destroyed a bank; 

as former comedians gather 

in darkest Norwich and Lincolnshire

to speak of your beige zip-up jackets. 

 

LBC Radio exclusively reveals your plan 

to give each failed asylum-seeker,

and anyone who’s ever

taken an axe to a child,

their own seat in 

the House of Lords;

the same day, The Spectator 

gives retired General

Franco space to expose your 

long term associations 

with known vegetarians

and Mexican importers 

of fair trade coffee. 

 

While on Radio Four’s Women’s Hour 

the former editor of the News of The World

and Dame Myra Hindley agree:

the last thing this country needs

right now is you.  

 

KEVIN HIGGINS 




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